Ce Soir ou Jamais

tonight I write...or never

Saturday, April 29

This is about as good as it gets

My daughter and I are having chocolate day. Just because. We've downed the rest of her dark chocolate bunny left from Easter and shared a peanut butter egg. We are so in love right now, despite the Seattle rain. Rather than venture out to complete all the errands on my mental to do list (kid haircut, mom brow wax, odds and ends needed from Target, purchase of a friend's wedding gift) we are doing, yet again, a marathon of Harry Potter. During my first trimester when I thought I was extremely depressed/and or had the flu for an extended time since I had no clue I was pregnant, movie marathons were a staple on the weekends for Darian. And I could sleep through it all. But not today! I'm filled with happiness and delight from my chocolate high! Oh, and COFFEE!!! I tried coffee for the first time yesterday and found it to be MOST GLORIOUS!! How, oh how, could I deprive myself the 17 weeks I have left of this pregnancy? Needless to say, I had a small cup this morning and worked it off by Dysoning the pet hair from the hardwoods and furniture. Life couldn't be any better at the moment.

And what are YOU up to today?

Tuesday, April 25

Covering more ground faster than ever

I just took Dexter out for a mini walk (read: run around the yard since the child is inside sick on this glorious sunny day in Seattle). Just as I was walking down the back stairs, I felt my arm being pulled from the socket, the sound of Dexter's howls filling the quiet of the neighborhood. A UPS truck was rounding the corner, passing our house. Dexter was nuts with glee in an attempt to chase the big brown box down the road, something I had never seen him do.

I then realized that to the golden retriever, the UPS truck is just one giant squirrel.

Monday, April 24

This is what makes it all worthwhile

"I have to tell you that I am so excited to become a big sister! And I'm not even jealous...yet!! You know why I am so excited? Because you are the best mommy in the world. You're such a great mommy because you are so loving. And it's good that you are having another baby."

My daughter knows all the right things to say to make my cup runneth over with hearts and flowers. How lucky am I?

Friday, April 21

Sometimes, I just lose faith in humankind

Believe it or not, I'm that really optimistic person who truly thinks that people have good intentions. People want to do good things, be kind and helpful to others, and not be completely selfish. Don't they? Lately, I'm beginning to question my optimism.

The other day I was in a local Italian coffee shop for my weekly dose of chocolate gelato. It was a busy afternoon and the register closest to the door was closed and customers were requested to place their orders and pay toward the back of the cafe. I stood in a semi-formed line being the 5th one from the register. A person working there opened the front register to ease the line, and she decided to help the first person who walked in the door- not any of the people who had been in line. I questioned this, as did the person behind me and we were hushed by the cashier, "I'm helping these people. You will just have to wait."

"But that is what I have been doing!! Why are you helping people who just walked in the door?"

She ignored my question and then decided to help the man 2 people behind me. Both the person behind me and I said that, actually, the person in front of me was to be next, not this other man. That person? She didn't really care. So I laughed and said, "I'm pregnant. I'd just like my gelato fix." The man then said to me, "So what? My wife is pregnant, too," and turned to the cashier to order his coffee. The person who accompanied him told him she was embarrassed to be seen with him. But did she offer to let me order? Did the cashier say anything? DID I SAY ANYTHING? I let it go. Afterall, there are more important things to hope for in this world- like that guy burning himself on his coffee- and frankly, I was enjoying the time I was away from my desk.

My husband was in the U-Scan checkout line of the grocery store. At this particular store, as I am sure is protocol in others, one line forms and when a station opens, the next person in line makes their purchase. My husband and several others had been waiting when a woman who must not have seen the line (I'm about benefit of the doubt, too!) stepped up to the next open station. My husband was not next, but the man in front of him politely let her know that there was a line and he was next. She told him that if he wanted her spot, he could pay for her groceries. And she proceeded with her scanning and no one said a word to her, though many comments were muttered under breaths.

I get to the office rather early in the morning- a few minutes or so before 6am. In the neighborhood of my office, there are a handful of free parking spots. Yes! Free all day parking in Seattle! Yesterday I happened to watch a man get into his truck that was parked in one of those free spots. I pulled up next to him to ask if he was leaving so that I could have his spot. I rolled down my window and started waving, then honked. I knew he saw me, yet did not turn in my direction. Instead, he mouthed the words 'FUCK OFF'. He had no idea why I was pulled up next to him! He didn't even look at me!! I honked. And then I honked some more. After giving my bozo the clown squeaker of a horn 25 more pushes and him *still* not looking in my direction- though a passerby asked me how they could help me and I said, 'Well, I'm trying to get this guys' attention!'- I finally had it. I drove away being sure to wave goodbye with my middle finger. Someone in my office said they knew who that guy was and he just likes to sit in his truck. Being an ass.

I think you are getting the picture, but I will close with one final anecdote. In front of my office is a pedestrian crosswalk. In fact, it's a pedestrian friendly neighborhood as it plays host to several art galleries, not to mention the city's two sports stadiums. How anyone can speed with folks walking about is beyond me, but it happened not 4 days ago. I was in the middle of said cross walk when a car came speeding toward me. I started to scream, ''Stop! Stop!,' while holding out an arm, but the car kept coming. Had I not jumped back, I would have been hit, and I would not be here to blog about it. The driver of the car? HE GAVE ME THE FINGER!! I actually got a little emotional after that. I called my husband in near tears to rant about what had happened and how I am really starting to lose faith in humankind.

I'm not going off about political agendas or the state of the world as I see it. Those things madden the hell out of me. But to see such apathy and selfishness on a local, everyday level just baffles me. These are my neighbors: the people in my office building, the folks down the street shopping at the same store, the cafe I frequented daily before getting pregnant.

What's happening? Why can't people be accountable for their mistakes and oversights? Why do they have to be so rude?

Monday, April 17

The Dexter Bunny

We're not big celebrators of Easter here at Monkey Hill. We generally refer to it as 'That Day We Get To Eat Chocolate In The Morning.' My daughter thinks the Easter Bunny is a guy in a suit who chain smokes and passes out candy. "Here, " he says in the voice of Marge Simpson, "take your candy." Or at least, that is what we have told her. Now, Santa, oh don't even get me started. My kid is a *huge* fan of Santa. (Even though I'm not!) As she likes to say: there are no such things as bunnies who give out chocolate. But Santa, that's a guy who is real. And his flying reindeer? That's what's called *magic*. The kid's got a point, why beg to differ?

What we do glean from Easter is the springtime happiness and wishing to spend time with family- which we did. The weather was wacky and fabulous in Seattle; we had a lovely brunch at my husband's sister's house. Late afternoon was Mommy and Me time and we decided to spend it walking the dogs and shopping, but to our dismay TARGET WAS CLOSED.

So we had more fun with the dogs.

Hope your weekend was as wonderful as ours!

Saturday, April 15

Welcome to the world, Liam!!

Lora had her baby!! Please stop by to wish her well and a happy birthday to her new bundle of love.

Wednesday, April 12

He has good taste in sweaters

My golden retriever, Dexter, is a fabric lover and shows us that love by chewing crater sized holes in various things he finds in the house. And not just anything he can find- he is very specific that it has to be quality items. First it started with the tassels on my fancy fainting couch pillow. Then it moved to my husband's Calvin Klein boxer briefs. So far, he has chewed through six pair. It got to the point one week where my husband had to do laundry 3 times just to have clean, non holey underpants. (Yes- my husband does his own laundry!!) Fortunately, he has replenished his underpants supply and guards his laundry basket tighter than Ft. Knox.

At first, I thought this was a passing fad. Once Dexter got a taste of the bathroom rug and the foul rubber backing, throwing it back into the bathroom as to infer that it needed to be cleaned, I'd hope that was the last of it. Until he discovered my laundry basket. He selected key items- some of my favorite and most expensive lingerie. Oh, no, not my Victoria's Secret bras, but the Wacoal! I don't work at Nordstrom anymore; those bras are expensive to replace! I then got a clue from my husband and ensured that my laundry was well guarded. I've come home many times in the past few weeks to simply find Darian's socks and her funderoos on the dog bed. Dexter had enough of the finer fabrics our wardrobe had to offer. He discovered easily replaceable, and cheap, things to chew. Or so I thought.

For years I had been asking for one those really super comfy, hand knitted Irish fisherman type sweaters. You know, the ones that are so warm, not very fashionable, but incredibly warm and cozy? They are not something you really find while out doing your new school clothes shopping, and frankly, I had only seen them in specialty shops in little tourist towns. Not going to buy a heavy lambswool sweater while on a summer trip. So, I just kept it in the back of my mind until a few years ago when a friend went to Ireland and brought me back a sweater! The very sweater I had been wishing for over the years. I called it my 'twenty pound sweater.' As soon as you took it off, you dropped 20 lbs, or at least looked like you did. That sweater kept me warm many a winter and even grew a little with me during this pregnancy. Until last night.

My husband was coming into the bedroom to kiss me good night, and while walking through the living room to turn down the lights, he noticed something on the dog bed. He picked it up and brought it to me. It was my twenty pound sweater. I gasped as my husband slowly unbundled it to reveal a hole in the back the size of my ass. My hand knitted, carried overseas from Ireland, special twenty pound sweater. Now, nothing more than a worthless ball of wool.

Needless to say, Dexter slept in his kennel all night long as punishment and this morning tried his best to steer clear of me. I'm now trying to figure out how to get the $300 out of him to replace the sweater he ate.

Dogs! At least Ellie, my other boy, likes to chew bones.

Saturday, April 8

Stuff Portrait Friday on a Saturday

Yesterday was Stuff Portrait Friday at Kristine's. The topic for yesterday was
Take me off AUTO.
1. Macro: take a picture of something ‘close up’. Don’t use your zoom, make sure you have good lighting and make sure you’re steady. If you have to, set your camera down on something and then take the picture.

2. NO FLASH: try swiching the flash off and taking pictures of your stuff without it. It may take a lot of pictures to get the right shot, but open the windows and find artifical light to get it to work.

3. Perspective: get up high or down low…either way, change the perspective of your picture..tilt the camera sideways. Change the layout of the picture. Instead of having the subject framed perfectly in the middle of the picture…move it to the left or the right.

This first one is Perspective. I got down on the floor, under a chair to get this one of my pom, Ellie.

This one is No Flash. My husband says our daughter looks sad and impoverished, but really she is just waiting to turn back around to watch the Disney channel. So, yeah, I guess she is a bit sad!

This last one is Macro. It's my butter dish.

Did you play?

More fun with cheesey video

In this scene, Dexter asks Darian for a snack, and makes a big confession....

Tuesday, April 4

You miss my dogs, don't you?

Rather than complain about them, sit back and watch a whole minute and a twenty-three seconds of my dogs. (The filming is horrible, cause of my lame camera, so that really does add insult to injury.) This scene is literally repeated 50 times a day while I am home. And people ask me why I am bringing a baby into the mix. Because I love to be tortured!!!

Here's what happened exactly 40 seconds later: