Ce Soir ou Jamais

tonight I write...or never

Sunday, February 5

Who says you shouldn't have instant puddin'?

Before I knew I was pregnant, I had been craving chocolate pudding. Maybe it's because my friend and I have this acquaintance we call 'Cosby' and I think of Jell-O Pudding every time that name is mentioned. (And how I would be Fat Albert if I lived on nothing but pudding.)

Six weeks have past, thinking often of chocolate pudding, and I finally gave into my cravings. I purchased some wonderfully decadent Bavarian Chocolate Pudding from Trader Joe's. Oh. My. The smooth, creamy, chocolate goodness. How could I have just one spoonful? I didn't just 'give in' to a chocolate craving; I dove head first into Willy Wonka's Chocolate River without consideration to come up for air. I consumed the entire container, save for few bites given unwillingly to my daughter.

This treat should not have been eaten right before bedtime. While I certainly felt euphoric, loving everyone and everything, not minding the dogs barking and the non stop Seattle rain, my heart would not stop racing. I realized at that moment that I had not just finished off a bowl of chocolately goodness, rather, I'd just consumed a big bowl of crack. How would I ever be fresh enough in the morning for another grueling day in the office? What have I done to my unborn child??!!!!

That night I had probably the worst night's sleep since discovering ear plugs to protect my hearing from the Darth Vader like snores of my husband. I tossed, I turned, I arose several times to chew on Tums. I cried in agony, "How does one come down from a pudding high? I Don't Know!!!!" I must have blacked out from all the Tums cause the next thing I knew, it was the next morning and I was on the front lawn encouraging my little dog to go pee-pee. I returned to the house, the bathroom being the first room requesting my visit. I looked in the mirror and was dismayed at what I saw.

My face was not only bloated, but I had two (not one, but *two*) ginormous zits glowing with pink fluorescence on my cheek and forehead. They seemed to be mocking me, "Nyah, nyah! See what happens when you eat pudding before bed, suckah?" I cried and drowned my sorrows in my exfoliating facial scrub and overpriced moisturizer guaranteed to take away the wrinkles while providing me with powerful anti-oxidants- and an SPF!

My vanity had gotten the best of me.

Yay, though I will pass through the aisles of Trader Joe's fantasizing about the creaminess and satisfaction that chocolate pudding provides, I know in truth that I would turn into a zit ridden insomniac, incapable of nothing more than crashing from a sugar high, and purchasing expensive cosmeceuticals.


  • At 7:03 PM, Blogger Vajana said…

    Chocolate pudding huh? Hmm. I think I would like to have some too, but I already ate the last one in the fridge.


    Go get some peanut butter!


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