Weekend observations for a Sunday evening

1. It's Memorial Day weekend and while most American families plan camping trips and all day bbq's, we keep it simple. We don't do a damn thing.

2. We had a heat advisory this past Friday which meant it was crotchpot cooking. That's right...I had schweaty balls. I happen to be your overweight Mommy, J Bo-D, and because of the excess padding I. Sweat. Profusely. And when my fluffy dog wants to sit on my lap whilst I sit outside, stickiness ensues. Yuck.

3. I cannot play tennis. I took Darian over to the court yesterday and attempted to serve her practice balls. I hit her twice- once in the face and once in the chest making her cry really hard. Fortunately she has a lot of forgiveness for someone with such lame aim as her mother.

4. I have no concept of the fast food drive through. Yesterday I went to Dairy Queen and after starring at the menu board for 5 minutes- I kid you not- I pulled forward, almost hitting the car in front of me, and ordered directly at the window. I pissed off *a lot* of heat sufferers in need of a frozen treat making them wait even longer for their orders.

5. I have really cool neighbors. The Wilsons had us over Friday night for sprinkler time and dinner and tonight the neighbors on the opposite end of the block are hosting their outdoor theater complete with Bose surround sound. We're bringing chips and salsa!

6. I have become too obsessed with my basement carpets. I have spent the last hour playing with my new toy- the Bissell Spotlifter.

7. I should get the child out of the house right now. Oh sure, we ran errands- Target, Party City, and Trader Joe's- but that was while we had a breeze and overcast. Time to slather on the sunscreen and make her play outside!